Social Issues & Ideas
Make People More Social:
People aren't social enough anymore. I think we need to have more parties. Not just Republican and Democrat parties, but lots of little parties, too. Like birthday parties, office parties, tea parties. I don't think we politicians have done enough for our parties -- or yours.
What about my social agenda? I've got some serious party issues on my social agenda!
When I'm elected, I'll see that every month, everyone gets the 3rd Friday off for a big party, where all the politicians get together and do some serious partying with their constituents. We can call these the "new" political parties. It'll take some serious politicking to get this idea through Congress, but I'm determined to give a new meaning to "party politics."
Do I have any specific social programs in mind? Sure!...
Let's have an ice cream social. You know, one of those old-fashioned community get-togethers where everyone enjoys ice cream in the middle of the town square, and chats about the weather and about each others' clothes and kids?
Maybe we can have a National Ice Cream Social every year -- on the 4th of July!
Heck, we're all just wandering around in the heat all day, anyway -- waiting for the sun to set and the fireworks to start.
Why, if we made everybody at the social wear their political party's symbols on their chest, the fireworks might start a lot sooner! That might result in a downright anti-social Ice Cream Social, but whaddya expect from Ice Cream Socialism, anyway? A new "Cold War," maybe?
When I'm elected, it'll be on a platform of Ice Cream Socialism. My flavor's strawberry.
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